The Skyflakes

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interview and photo by Pepito Pea

interview photo of the skyflakes, by pepito pea The Skyflakes are often lovingly described as "cute and bubbly" or "sweet and sugary." But I know better.
Just listen to their lyrics. Underneath the indie rock swirls and cuddly pop hooks are some mean words about putting bullets in yourself, dropping acid, talking shit about co-workers, and meatheads with body image problems. Appropriately, I conducted a late night drive-by interview with the Skyflakes beneath a broken street lamp and some barbed wire on a sketchy street corner in downtown Oakland after a show. Here is the straight up shit on these gangstas from the 408:

PEPITO: Quick, before OLIVER gets here. What is OLIVER's "fatal flaw?"
JESSE+RON+JERICHO (in unison): He takes three dumps a day.
TRICIA: You guys are so mean.
PEPITO: What is Ollie's fatal flaw then, Tricia?
TRICIA: Um. He takes three dumps a day.
PEPITO: Hey Ollie!
PEPITO: OK. Please say who you are and what you do in the Skyflakes BESIDES the instrument you play.
JESSE: I'm Jesse. I play bass.
PEPITO: No, no, no. What do you do BESIDES your instrument?
JESSE: What?
PEPITO: You know, like loading the van, or playing wrongs notes...
JESSE: Oh. I'm Jesse and I book our shows.
RON: I'm Ron. I ask Jesse where we are playing.
JERICHO: Uh. I'm Jericho. I'm just young.
OLIVER: I'm Oliver...
JERICHO: And you take three dumps a day.
OLIVER: Yeah... And I cook!
TRICIA: I'm Tricia and uh... I do whatever Ron tells me to do.
PEPITO: While a lot of your songs are obviously influenced by late 90's
nu-metal, I'm curious what 80's bands inspire your often brutal live shows? RON: Kraftwerk.
TRICIA: The Go-Gos.
JERICHO: The Cure and the Sugarcubes.
OLIVER: The Smiths.
PEPITO: Jesse? Well?
TRICIA: Somebody better say New Order!
JESSE: New Order.
PEPITO: What? I expected you to say like DOA or the Descendents.
JESSE: OK. DOA or the Descendents.
PEPITO: Which Skyflake is most likely to get naked?
JERICHO: I have the worst body, so it won't be me. It's baaad.
OLIVER: Jericho!
TRICIA: I don't want to see any of these guys naked!
OLIVER: Actually, we're all related, so that's kinda sick...
PEPITO: OK. If you had to choose between: 1. A dinner with Bjork; 2. Playing the Conan O'Brien Show; or 3. Winning $50,000 on Win Ben Stein's Money, which would it be?
OLIVER: The 50 grand.
TRICIA: No way! Dinner with Bjork!
PEPITO: And why?
OLIVER: Because I am totally broke.
TRICIA: Because she is HOTT!
JERICHO: Dinner with Bjork.
PEPITO: Where would you take her?
JERICHO: I would take her to Lucky Chances.
PEPITO: Wait, you mean Lucky Penny.
JERICHO: No, that's different. Cafe Colma in Lucky Chances, a casino in Colma. You can get Filipino food there 24 hours a day.
RON: I'd take the money and then go to Lucky Chances.
JESSE: Play Conan. And then beat the crap out of Carson Daly on TRL.
JERICHO: That ass is trying to use "hyperbolic" to mean "cool" now. "Dude, hyperbolic!"
PEPITO: How was your show at Marine World in Vallejo last week?
JESSE: Hot. Real hot. I got burnt.
RON: The show was pointless, but the rides were fun.
JERICHO: I liked the elephant show. And Jesse was scared of the butterflies! He ran away!
JESSE: ...
TRICIA: It was fun clearing out the place!
RON: Yeah, especially the hip hop crowd!
PEPITO: Ollie, your basketball skills as well as comedic talents are legendary. Wrap this up with an impromptu impression of Jericho stoned.
OLLIE: Uh... uh... uh... like, I think I can stop time.

© 2019, The Skyflakes.